Of Duct Tape and DW-40 The gundam pilots are wandering through wal-mart... Heero: i'm not so sure about this. our mission was to buy parts for our gundams. can we really accomplish this at Wal-Mart? Duo: of course! they have EVERYTHING at wal-mart! WuFei: INJUSTICE!!!!!!!! Quatre: what's so unjust about shopping at wal-mart? Duo: This is Wu-man we're talking about. he thinks EVERYTHING is unjust. WuFei: Yes! it is unjust, and don't call me Wu-Man!!!! Trowa: what's this stuff, you guys? *holds up a roll of duct tape.* Quatre and Duo: ohhh. ahhh. it's pretty... Heero: i don't care if it's pretty. is it of any use to us? Milliardo and Noin walk by with an entire shopping cart full of Duct tape and WD-40. Quatre: Oh, hi miss noin! Heero: Milliardo, we were wondering, can you tell us what this is, and would it be of any use to us? *holds up the duct tape* Milliardo: yes, we use it to fix everything from mobile suits to refrigerators. there was an old american proverb: God may have created the world, but Duct tape holds it together. WuFei: INJUSTICE!!! have you no integrity!!!!! Duo: don't mind him. Noin: anyway, it's very useful stuff, as is WD-40. you can fix nearly anything with the two. Trowa: so it's useful, this...duct tape. Noin: hell yes. WuFei: stupid onna! Duo puts about 50 rolls of duct tape in the shopping cart and grabs several cans of wd-40. Heero: very well. Mission, accomplished. Duo, Trowa and Quatre: thanks you guys! Milliardo: no problem. Noin: don't mention it. and so they leave wal-mart armed with one of the most powerful forces in the universe: duct tape. the next morning at the gundam pilot frat house (i'm the author and if i say the gundam pilots live in a frat house,then damnit, they live in a frat house!)... Duo runs into the living room where the other pilots are eating kiddie cerial and watching Sailor Moon. Duo: hey you guys, come see what i've done with all that duct tape we bought yesterday! WuFei: INJUSTICE!!! they haven't even used their sailor planet powers yet! but they manage to pry WuFei away from the tv and into the garage where duo was working on the deathscythe... Duo: I worked on it all night. Now in addition to the gundanium, it also has duct tape armor, and a duct tape machine gun. I shall call it... the DUCTTAPE HELL!!! everyone else is staring open mouthed at the former deathscythe, which is now coated in duct tape... Quatre: my dear sandrock, we must get some more of this wonderful duct tape... WuFei: We are weak and unworthy, Nataku. we must use duct tape and become stronger... And so all the other gundam pilots start making duct tape related improvements to their gundams, while duo grabs some dw-40 and more duct tape, and tries to fix everything else in the gundam frathouse. When everyone else comes back in... Trowa: whoa! how'd he manage to fix the old fridge? that thing's been in this house since the early 70's, and that was the BEFORE COLONY 70's! he says pointing to the avacado green fridge, which now has some duct tape on it and faintly smells like wd-40. Duo: i put the freezer door back on with the duct tape,and also used it to fix the seal. i used the wd-40 on the hinges of the other door, and cleaned out the little exhaust vent thingy with the wd-40. WuFei: INJUSTICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Trowa: is it just me, or is he starting to annoy you guys? everyone else: YES!!! Duo with a sinister look on his face: i know what we can do...we'll fix the problem with duct tape! Heero: mission...accepted! and everyone attacks WuFei with several rolls of duct tape... Quatre: You guys! we really shouldn't be fighting!!!! Heero: and WuFei shouldn't be trying to piss us off! WuFei *muffled* INJUSTICE!!!!!!!!! after several minutes Duo, Heero, and Trowa back off, revealing WuFei, who is now a duct tape mummy. Quatre: wow! Miss Noin was right, duct tape really CAN fix anything!